The other day, I was finishing my workout with a core routine. Lately, I’ve been really digging deep with progressive overload and applying it to my abdominals, just as I would any other muscle. It’s paying off - not just in how defined my muscles are becoming. I also have reduced lower back pain, and I can feel my pelvic floor is stronger than it’s ever been. If you’ve had children, you know what I’m referring to lol
So, I was gassed but feeling that feeling you get when your workout is on fire.
With my headphones on, as I sat up, I could tell the guy staring at me was also saying something, but I couldn’t hear what.
I asked, “Sorry. What?”
He said, “That’s a killer core workout.” My reply?
“Well, at my age you have to work hard.” WTF?!? Thanks was the simple answer. Just thanks. But no, I had to diminish my own hard work. That was my first response.
To his credit, he answered back, “No. That’s hard at any age.” He’s right. I have worked really, really hard to get stronger and stronger in my 58-year-old body. I’ve trained and studied, and I know what I’m doing, and it’s working.
I responded and corrected myself: “Thanks. I love to train abs; the harder the better.”
But as I left that day, I kept wondering why my first response was to diminish my own hard work.
I think it simply comes down to old habits of thinking. Of staying smaller to make someone else feel better. Trying not to appear too bold or arrogant.
It’s also good, old-fashioned lack of self-confidence. I would love to tell you I embrace my wrinkles, my cellulite, and my graying hair 100% of the time, but that wouldn’t be truthful. Negative thoughts come and go, and sometimes, they linger longer than they should. I know there are other women way more “shredded” or “jacked” than I am. And older than I am, with a more muscular physique. Does that mean I can’t be proud of where I am now? Of course not. As women, we need to remind ourselves that someone else’s bright light doesn’t make ours glow less brightly. The more we surround ourselves with bright lights. The friends who celebrate each other’s success and cheer for each other, the brighter we all glow.
When I think about that moment at the gym the other day, I realize that I actually have more self-confidence at age 58 than at 28. I have accomplished much in my life, and my self-awareness is stronger than ever. I have done the work on myself, and I know exactly who I am and what I want.
Though I may have a moment or two, here and there, when I start to compare and despair, most of my days are spent in gratitude for this body of mine.
Aging is a gift. Wisdom is a privilege that comes from living and loving deeply. Daring to risk failure and heartbreak. Staying in this mindset is a choice, and I am proud to say that I can shift out of it much more quickly than when I was younger. Thank God for getting old! I’m getting wiser too.
The message I will end with is this: we don’t have to make ourselves smaller to make others feel better.
xoxo
Jenny
